Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Trust

I'm in a crazy situation. I have the hardest time trusting people. Me not being able to trust people also puts a damper on me making friends. So in the recent years I have opened up, and I have made some GREAT friends. At the same time, I have met some people who have taken advantage of my kindness and have caused me to back track. Now I'm at the point where I don't want to trust anyone again.

I hate being at this stage of my life. And I'm mad at the people who cause me to feel this way. We can easily say to avoid people who will cause me to be negative towards everyone, but these people are sneaky. They're the kind people who smile in your face, but when a situation arises where you need them, they don't have your back. Yet, when they need you, they know they can call you at the drop of a dime. I'm talking about those people who try to balance things. I'll drive to the restaurant which took up 10 dollars of gas and they think they did me a favor by buying me a $3 meal. I'll watch their 5 children all week and they think they evened it out by babysitting my child for 2 hours during nap time.

I don't know what to say and I don't know how to feel. Do these people know that they're rude and taking advantage of people? How do I avoid them when they seem nice the first time we meet. Should I just keep the friends that I have and avoid making new ones? Is that being closed minded? I'm telling you I'm really stuck. I don't want to make any more friends. I'm good with the ones I have. At the same time, I thought I was good with the friends I had before and my husband told me to make more friends, and I did. I met some great people. That's one of the reasons I'm questioning if it's worth closing up. Will I miss out on the opportunity to meet more great people?

I may not be able to trust people, but let me trust God. I just need a way to open up without being too open. Let me know what you all think about that? Have you had similar situations? How have you handled it?